my latest guess

I've been corresponding with a writer friend about why we have such high expectations of almost everything. One-third of me doesn't want to publish this because, at least in the moment, I am being honest. Two-thirds of me (or almost two-thirds) thinks this is another chance for me to try to connect. I'm no philosopher; handle me with care.

Here's my latest guess.

when we write, we are convinced that people will connect with us and we will finally have that real, true connection we are missing in our daily lives. but the real connection is between ourselves and the page, not between ourselves and the reader. that's really why we write: because we need to connect with our characters and this is how we plug into ourselves. we don't/won't get the gratification that we desire from our readers. the only way they live up to what we expect is by making them into characters that we can understand, or try to understand, and control, or try to control. often, wrestling with a character is easier than wrestling with a real person.

in the end, feeling understood by a real person feels nothing like writing. we want all of it: connection to "real" people and connection to our writing.


-movies in the last 48: Mask (I did it for Cher and Jens. Rocky Dennis!): A; The Heart of Me (super boring, but one or two good sex scenes): C; Stranger Than Fiction (Ellen made me): B
-I'm thinking about changing my blog name to "My Main Character" if it's available. Yes? No?
-song: The Opposite of Hallelujah by (you guessed it) Jens
-I'm also missing one of my Cher coasters. Eek.