Wednesday, April 23, 2008

I have this friend, Abbey...



...and she's fierce.

Abbey and friends arrived! As planned, we kept the cash-flow to a minimum. The visitors are in love with Yaffa Cafe. (Nick, in particular, manages to find something to appreciate in almost everything. I admire that about him, and hope some of this trait rubs off on me.)

We took a tour of my old neighborhood, and we ran into Rob, good old Rob. According to him, I was lucky to get out of my apartment when I did because the kitchen sink apparently backed up and stuff came flying out. And there was some kind of flood (worse than the one that I encountered). A tenant moved in for a couple of weeks, but right after the sink problems, he skedaddled. When talking to Rob, one must assume that everything he says is an exaggeration, but still, it was nice to hear that I made the right choice about leaving.


Mostly, the five of us chilled in Tompkins Square Park: a little people watching and a whole lot of sun.

Abbey's sister, Heather, and super bff, Franny are moving to the city this summer, maybe even to Astoria. All the cool things about Abbey exist in her posse, too. Eeep! New friends!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Carry your own darn weight.

Maybe I should just rename this "Gili's Aikido Blog."

Day three kicked my buns. Mike makes funny, squeaky noises and today he showed me what it feels like to have my wrist/arm/elbow twisted off. So great!

All this empowerment illuminates how much energy people/work/things take from me instead of give me. I'm learning how to be strong, how to contain my own energy, and how to not put other people's weight on my shoulders. I can shift my weight, so that others are empowered to learn to carry their own (damn) weight.

Tonight, Abbey is driving from Vermont to New York! We're going to have a cheap-ass, penny-pinching time, hanging out together! And tomorrow, the weather is supposed to be gorgeous.

I danced on the train home, just thinking about how good I've been feeling without all the energy sucked out of me by unneeded stressors.

I wrote a secret reminder note to myself on both sides of my hand.

In honor of Pesach, today one of my new students asked me if I am Jewish, and followed up with a question about whether or not my father is a rabbi. That's a new one.

Monday, April 21, 2008

more like me

These are strange times: As I was running through Astoria today, a pigeon flew directly into my shoulder. I could still feel the impact after the pigeon had flown away. (Remember my recent pigeon dream?)

Aikido = So perfect.

I learned new falls, rolls, attacks, and movements today. Mike instructed me. Again: patient, cheerful, kind, and positive.

Veronica and I ate sushi for dinner. We’re going to have a photo-adventure day in New York soon. Both of us like roaming around the city and taking pictures.

I hopped in the tub for some much needed relaxing of the muscles post-running and Aikido, and after an hour, my doorbell rang. On the second ring, I answered the intercom. Kim was in my neighborhood, checking out the area again. This could be our summer life: stopping by to say, “Hello, what’s doing? Want to hang out?"

Watched The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 preview today. I can't wait! (Stop judging me.)

Must get some shut-eye.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

I Like Not Knowing

I did it: I Aikido’d. My instructor, an Australian mate named Luke had patience and encouraged me/gave me positive feedback. He taught me basic rolls and attack positions. I’m going back tomorrow for another lesson before meeting up with Veronica in the evening.

For the most part, I spend my time participating in activities, which I’m already somewhat good at doing. I like the challenge of being a beginner in Aikido. It’s humbling and engaging, and there seems to be an infinite number of skills to learn. Plus, I have to be present in my body, which means taking a break from over-thinking. Also, I like being the new girl.

After Aikido, I met Kim at our favorite brunch spot in Astoria, Ovelia. (Did you know that sometimes omelets are made with French fries inside of them? Recommended!)

We walked back to my house and admired the view from the roof. Then, we stopped by the realtor’s office to find a new home for Kim. She may rent an apartment in a building right next to mine! I’m trying not to get my hopes up, but they are.

-Eyes on the page: The Cement Garden by Ian McEwan and the comics of David Heatley
-Eyes on the screen: Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore, Coming Apart, and Kadosh
-Ears on the noise: I Got it Bad sung by Nina Simone, Hard Times in New York Town by Bob Dylan, and Nobody’s Baby Now by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds

Happy day two of Passover!

Saturday, April 19, 2008

the beginnings of an upswing, I do declare



Hello! What a gorgeous day to be alive in New York.

Last night, when I got home, I went up to the roof and watched the city for a long time.

This morning, I observed my first ever Aikido classes. Everyone was so warm and eager to answer my questions. I almost started crying from the beauty of watching such an understandable metaphor for life. I've wanted to do Aikido since working with Meredith in the Bay Area, and now I am progressing into more self-actualization. I feel empowered and I am regaining my strength.

Tomorrow, I think I will head back to Manhattan to take my first Aikido class (nervous!) before I meet up with Kim for brunch.

(Thanks to Mom and Dad for giving me Aikido classes for my birthday. Thanks to Gracie and Meredith for seeing me.)

Lifelong goals that are still on the list: Tap dancing, getting much better at playing the drums, and springboard diving.

Happy Passover! As the old folklore goes, because I was born on Pesach, my mother told me that my first word was, "Matzo." I'm not going to admit here just how long it took me to realize that this was a fallacy.

Monday, April 14, 2008

cher is my rock

I don't agree with plagiarism, but I'm going to pretend that I wrote this genius blog post.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

my fake birthday in boston


I spent my fake birthday with my two favorite people in Boston.





Friday, April 11, 2008

a bit more bv


Everybody needs a Riva.

I'm coining a phrase (can you proclaim that?): Blogger Voice (or BV)-- When a person says a lot in a blog post, but really says nothing because they don't need the whole world to know everything about them, or even anything about them.

-About to start reading: The Selected Stories of Richard Bausch
-Finishing line: in sight for my thesis
-Friends don't let friends: go goth (thanks, Riva, for stopping me before it was too late).
-Don't know why I'm addicted to: Camera Obscura's Happy New Year

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

I could do this every night


Alana and Alex came with me to 192 Books to hear Tobias Wolff read.


He read the exact same stories as he did the night before, but his inflections were different, and I actually liked the talking dog story much more, the second time around.


I sat so close to him, I thought I'd need a paper bag. Alex and Alana encouraged me to ask my question. I felt like a schoolgirl, which I guess I am. I asked him if he enjoyed the process of writing. I guess I wanted to hear him say that he dreaded it, avoided it, ran from it, and his nights were sleepless, but in the end, nothing gave him the same kind of satisfaction as when the pieces of a story finally come together. Instead, he mostly said that the first draft gives him tons of anxiety, but the pleasure comes from rewriting and revising.






He signed my book, but he accidentally dated it for the year 2009. Then he corrected the date and initialed it like an accountant or a lawyer. Now, I feel like I traveled through time with him.



After Tobias, we treated ourselves to amazing cupcakes and fresh oj at Billy's Bakery in the West Village.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

flesh and words



I feel like a superhero: Kim was supposed to go with me to see Tobias Wolff read tonight at Barnes & Noble, but she pulled her back and spent the day at home, in pain. When I got home from teaching, I collected my leftover meds from when I pulled my back in November. I threw on my jogging clothes, and ran to her house with a Ziploc full of goodies.

I told her I would like to become a jogging nurse. It feels good to make people happy by administering pills. She suggested I would do better as a drug dealer. It’s nice to know I have options.

Once again, my body felt so good in motion.

I still went uptown to see The Great Tobias Wolff read.

He was taller and lankier than I imagined. I was shocked by how normal it became, after only minutes, to sit so close to Tobias Wolff and listen to him read. Maybe the neon Barnes and Noble lighting jarred the romance.

Don’t get me wrong for one second. I am absolutely in awe. But Toby was pushing it a bit with the talking dog story, “Her Dog.”

He acknowledged this: “The fun of being a writer is throwing the dice every so often.” But dog stories!

Hester Kaplan has a great anecdote. She sent her publisher a story about a dog, and her publisher wrote back, “No more f-ing dog stories!”

AMEN!

Toby appeased me: “There are no other talking-dog stories in my oeuvre, but now I’ve got one.”

You know what, Toby? You can do anything you want and I will follow you down. Nobody else can stand in front of a crowded bookstore and say that writing is “a heroic attempt to get at the truth through the agency of the imagination.” Who talks like that? I’ll tell you who: The Great Tobias Wolff.

Tomorrow night: my second Toby reading. And this one is located in an independent bookstore, which I believe is the opposite of B&N. I’m going to be riding on the next humpback whale to outer space (i.e. heaven).

Brian Bouldrey prescribes Zen or Amish country, this website, and Chekhov plays for my ailments.

Monday, April 07, 2008

the way you ride those waves

I can't seem to concentrate on my writing with everything else going on. That's completely an excuse. Really, I don't like the story I'm trying to revise, and so, I've found a ton of other ways to occupy my time.

Today, I ran to Astoria Park. I hadn't been there before and I had built up all these ideas of what an amazing, vast, lush, green, tropical, etc., park would await me. Not so. Not so. I mean, it's on the water and it's got a good running track, but this wasn't Muir Woods. It does seem to be the nicest place to run to in Astoria, so I think I'll go there on a regular basis. I ran faster and longer than usual. I needed to push myself today.

Cornelius had the sweetest little asthma attack tonight (her second ever). I knelt down in the bathroom next to her and rubbed her back and told her that she was going to be okay. (I know, nobody cares about my pet anecdotes. Ah, the life of the lonely.)

-On repeat: Lay Your Head Down by Keren Ann (Right now, there is no better song. Again, with the waves.)
-On my nightstand: The Art of Subtext by Charles Baxter
-On my planner: Starting tomorrow, two nights in a row of Tobias Wolff (genius on the loose).
-On my own: now.

I am waiting for clarity.

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Veronica, Varuni, Denise, Terry, and RIVA all in one day

Dreamed that my head accidentally fell on the pavement on top of a pigeon with a broken wing. Blood and guts were spilling out of the pigeon and onto my hair. I scrubbed my hair with shampoo, but somehow, other people found out that my head had touched the insides of a pigeon, and nobody wanted to be around me.



Yup. Good dreams.



Today, Veronica met me for brunch. We had a Turkish buffet. I ate way too much, which is probably good since I've had no appetite lately. She's a good person to talk with (as are all my friends), and I feel like I can count on her.



On the subway platform uptown, I ran into Varuni and her cello. She seemed disoriented and strange, and I wondered if it was my doing, or if she's just like that, and I'd forgotten. Anyway, I barely got to say "hi" because we were catching separate trains.

I went back to Astoria and worked on my thesis for the rest of the afternoon.

Then I headed into Manhattan for sushi with Terry and Denise. They were so supportive and sweet.



The big surprise was RIVA, who is driving back from Atlanta to Boston with a car-full of grad students. She stopped by sushi with Denise and Terry to hug me and give me lots of love. I'm so lucky to have her in my life.



I'm so glad that I made a bunch of plans this weekend. I feel really loved and taken care of by so many people (including people who don't live in NY).

So, thank you.

I'm posting more Jens pictures because I have a million more from last night.

Oh, and here's the new haircut that Veronica fashioned just for me. That woman is "shear" genius.

Saturday, April 05, 2008

me and those big old waves




These feelings remind me of the last time. Not that the situations are the same. But I remember what it was like to walk around and hear things, and see things, and feel things, and not talk to anyone about these experiences. My life is private, that's something that's always been true. But now it's sub-private, invisible. Or maybe now, it's just more pronounced.


Brunch with Kim. Got the friends lined up all weekend. That's helping.

Still, I cried during Jens Lekman's show tonight. Crying doesn't mean anything; I always cry. But it's just a conundrum. Feeling this way and also feeling that way about someone. This and that.

What lesson am I supposed to learn?

Maybe I'm not making any sense.

I think Jens' cover of an Arthur Russell song, A Little Lost puts it best.

I never wanted to be left alone.

Big Love to my Big Sister, Kimberley, one of the strongest people I know.


Sunday, March 30, 2008

I am a thesis robot

I haven't written because I've had very little time to do anything besides write my thesis and teach.

My life has been full of waking/sleeping thesis anxiety. Some nights, I dream that everyone I've ever met is really mean to me. Other nights, I dream that everyone hates my writing and is making fun of my thesis.

During my waking hours, I pack in as much revision, lesson-planning, grading, rewriting, reading, and teaching as my body will allow. I've got to get through this stretch of work, and some relief will be mine April 11.

Congratulations are in order to my brilliant friends:

*Sandra for acceptance into a million grad schools for urban studies/planning. Most importantly: FULL RIDE TO MIT!!! Sandra is most likely leaving the West Coast to begin school in Cambridge this coming fall! I'm so lucky!

*Jen H for acceptance into her desired grad school, University of Montreal, for viola. She busted her buns to make this happen!

*Abbey B for her first literary magazine publication!

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Kimberley, Gili, Riva






Also, in Cambridge I get to see my sister.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Riva, Gili, Matt








Cambridge means seeing old friends.


Love 'em.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Character sketch of Earl and me on the train

In New Haven, I gained a seatmate.

“Is this seat available?” He leaned down and looked right at me. I was eating an apple. First, I noticed his thick black glasses, lenses deep with bifocals. His cream-colored, bald head was speckled with age spots and bits of thinning hair on the sides. He must be in his late sixties or early seventies. He had a groomed, white goatee that connected with a white moustache. Red blood vessels streaked his cheeks.

As soon as he was seated, he rummaged in his dirty, camel-colored windbreaker (matching his tan cotton pants) and said, “Got a poem for you.”

He pulled out a hand-written, lined sheet of paper, titled, “Joyce.” And in a loud, confident voice, he began to orate a love poem. I cannot remember any lines from this poem because I was sent into a panic. How do I respond? Will he be on the train with me for the next hour and half until we reach Boston?

When he finished, I was staring out the window at the passing scenery; this did not deter him.

“How are you today?” he asked.

“I think I’d like to ride in silence,” I said.

“I will abide by your request,” he responded. “You just looked so dumbfounded there for a minute,” and he said something else, but I could not hear him. This whole time I was also listening to my Ipod.

I stared at his hands, brown hairs on the back sides, more age spots, nails longer and better cared for than my own, and felt a horrible guilt that I often feel when someone is different and I am forced to respond to them in public. Why should I hurt his feelings? Why not enjoy his poetry and learn something from a stranger? Isn’t it a writer’s job to be interested in everything?

He reclined in his chair, and when I finished my apple, I noticed a faint day-old urine smell emanating from him. He took out a plastic bottle of pills, the label rubbed off, from his pocket and threw one back with a sip of his Nestea. Then he replaced the cap on the pills and the cap on his Nestea and stuffed one bottle into his left pocket and the other bottle into the other.

More rummaging. He pulled out a ticket. I read it, shamelessly. Earl something. I can’t remember the last name. Traveling from New Haven to New London. Relief. He will only be riding for a short time. Yet, I am angry at myself for disengaging.

The conductor came by, and greeted my seatmate with cheer. They knew each other.

Earl unfolded a doctor's appointment slip for next week in New Haven.

The conductor called Earl, “a fine passenger,” and mentioned how good it was to see him.

Earl's big brown eyes stared through those thick glasses at my computer screen as I typed this and tried to shield him from it. I noticed the silver staple in his jacket cuff, his black lace-up boots. His elbow touched mine.

He removed his Nestea from his pocket and my thigh felt cold. I looked down and realized that he had accidentally spilled a few drops on my jeans.

“Oh, be careful,” I said, pointing at the spot and moving my computer away to protect it.

“I’m sorry,” he said, defeated.

When we went over a bridge in Connecticut, he held his fingers to his nose and puffed out through his mouth. He did this over and over until we were on the other side of the river. Then he took out his Nestea, took another sip, and replaced it in the pocket farther from me.

For the rest of the ride, we didn’t speak though his mouth stayed slightly parted.

I wanted to take back all of my properness, my scolding. I wanted to hear the poem again. I wanted to know everything.

He burped, a loud single note before we reached New London. Still, I wish I had been nicer.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

double, double toil and trouble

Coming off of a fabulously exhausting week. There's been no time to write, and there's still no time to write, but I want to get everything down before I forget.

Tuesday night (skipping Monday because I went to some arty/music thingy, which I found kind of boring minus great seating on a comfy futon) I got to see my friend, another student in my graduate school, Alana at Scott Heim's reading. Scott is our mentor's partner and has just published his third novel, We Disappear. The event was historical because the Chelsea Barnes and Noble is closing, and this was the final reading.

I wish (for many reasons) that I was a gay man (perhaps an attractive, white gay man) because there seems to be an instant community/readership built into publishing books with gay themes. Lucky for me, a lot of my work dabbles in the homosexual lifestyle. Now if only I had that extra feature that would make men buy my book at full-price. Not that Scott isn't talented. It's just that I have noticed that being a gay man comes with perks.

Alana, Joe, and I went out for bar grub and drinks after the reading. I wish Alana liked the city more because it's nice to be around a sharp writer with a similar perspective on writing. Sigh.

Then good news came my way. I'm going to have a monthly column in bookslut! My first interview will appear in the May issue. Stay tuned for more.

My thesis is taking up a tremendous amount of time, which is exhilarating, exhausting, lonely-inducing, and comforting. And many other feelings. The hardest part is focusing on my work that needs the most attention. Maybe that's obvious.

Last night, Joe and I joined my parents for a night of theater. We went to BAM to see Patrick Stewart and Kate Fleetwood in Macbeth. As tired as I was, I am realizing that it's nice to do something outside of watching movies. Theater uses a different part of the imagination. I did not LOVE this performance, but overall, my brain expanded. (Oh, the lack of articulation.)


Further news:

reading and admiring: Ethan Canin's The Palace Thief
thanks to Jen G, listening to: Beach House
worried about my addiction to: graphic novels. trying to keep it at bay, but couldn't resist Phoebe Gloeckner and Adrian Tomine this week.

Saturday, March 08, 2008

a flautist needs us

Back in the Bay Area, I started a small club (which consisted of three people) called FAF or Feelings Against Flutes.

Allow me to set the scene. Many afternoons, I would head to Wild Side West with a few friends to sit in the outdoor garden, perhaps on the tree swing, or in one of the hidden-by-shrubbery alcoves, and enjoy a cold beer or in the winter, a perfect cider and rum.

Bernal Heights, home of Wild Side West, can feel like such a suburban, serene escape from what I can only describe as the panic I often felt on the streets of the Mission and the Castro. This is merely because I am an intensely shy person and was unable to leave my house without running into people I knew. It began to feel a lot like college.

One afternoon, I needed to get away from the scene, and we drove up to W.S.W. for a little unwinding and privacy.

If you read this blog regularly, or have ever met me, then you may know that I have had a difficult time embracing the equine species. Similarly I have never taken to the sound that comes out of the supposedly musical instrument known as the flute. Flutes and horses are the same: prancing, snooty, girly, and just a little bit too silly to be taken seriously.

If you are a flute player, perhaps you will not agree. But listening to the flute reminds me of swallowing an ice cube before it has melted, the sharp corners burning inside of my throat.

So here I am at W.S.W., my defenses are down, and somewhere in the garden, the screeching of the flute floats my way. What can I do? I may/may not have been somewhat stoned, and I certainly was in no place to get up and do something about it. (Like what? Let's be realistic. Flute players don't take well to being told to pipe down).

In that moment, I founded Feelings Against Flutes. (Not to be confused with my other organization Pouting For Peace.) We sat and planned. Actually, once we figured out the acronym and decided who would hold what post, I think we forgot all about the club and sat seething until we decided to go home.

As President and one of the founders, I was overjoyed to come across this urgent poster in the subway station near my house. And by posting the information online, perhaps I will become a local flute hero. What a twist!


Other things going on:
-Do not be fooled by the atrocious picture on the cover, this is an amazing movie: The Mother
-Another fabulous movie that just came out (so to speak): Paranoid Park
-New music discovery: Broadcast album called Tender Buttons
-Reading: George Saunders' Civilwarland In Bad Decline
-As of yesterday, happy two-year blog anniversary to me!

Monday, March 03, 2008

a nerdy girl's dream come true



Joseph built a bookshelf for me. My apartment has been transformed into my own library/reading room. All day while I was teaching, I kept thinking about coming home and organizing my books into these sections: favorite fiction, general fiction, writing theory/lit crit, queer theory, reference, graphic novels, and oversize at the top.

If that isn't love...

Who knew furnishing an apartment could be so hot?



Media Report:
-Per Riva's recommendation, I've started watching Kebab Connection. I've seen the first half and so far, I'm enjoying myself, but I'm not attached.
-I saw Chop Shop, which is set in Flushing. This is the best movie I've seen so far in 2008.
-One more word on the P.S. 1 show, WACK! I was actually blown away by the extensiveness and the quality of the work in the exhibit. I've been thinking a lot about why feminist art (rising out of the feminist movement) is often labeled "outdated," which strikes me as dismissive. I haven't formed a theory about this yet, but that's why my last post referenced the aging of feminist art.
-My favorite pieces: Mari Lassing's videos, Kirsten Justesen's Sculpture II, Joan Semmel's First Erotic Series and Intimacy-Autonomy, and Rita Donagh's Contour.